What is Being Present? by John Kuypers ON-LINE SHOPPING
What is Being Present?
by John Kuypers ON-LINE
SHOPPING
Being Present is what you experience when you are completely focused on this very moment. Your feelings are calm. Your reflexes are fast. Your mind is clear. You are decisive. You know what you want. You know what's right for you. You perform your best - public speaking, sports, music, relating to people. Your confidence is deep. You know you're not perfect. This lets you be real. You accept you have weaknesses. So does everyone.
Being present is a time frame you choose to focus on. There are only three possible time frames - past, present and future. Once you become aware of the thoughts you are having and the content of those thoughts, you will notice which timeframe you are in at any given time. You will begin to notice how often your thoughts and feelings are focused on the past or the future. These thoughts are riddled with judgments, comparing the past or future to your present situation. Many people spend less than 1% of their time being fully present. The rest of the time, we drift in and out as our attention wanders. Your mind may even seem to be out of your own control.
Your memory is strong when You are
in the present.
Do you recall times that are very
clear in your memory? All of you
was in the "here and now" in those
moments - in a first love, on a
great vacation, with a trusted friend.
These were moments when you felt safe. You will
be present more often when you
learn to feel safe even in difficult,
stressful, anxious situations - when
people criticize you, when you make mistakes, when you are in
a financial jam or in a love life crisis.
Otherwise, outside circumstances will
dictate when you are able to be
present...or not.
Being present
happens in an instant. So does
not being present. An upsetting thoughts triggers
emotions based on the past hurts or
future fears.
It happens in an instant and is highly
dependent on how good your boundaries
are. Both result in
conflict and unhappiness rooted in
past and future-based thoughts and
feelings. This is the real You that
you want to keep hidden.
The path to being more real in the present is to stop comparing. We compare the present with what "should" be happening. The result of this is judgments. We judge situations, other people and ourselves. Judgments make it hard to be present. Our minds become pre-occupied with thoughts that analyze the past or role-play the future. We live in the past to lick our wounds or we live in the future because we don't trust ourselves that we'll be okay in the future.
Being present means learning to live as if you have nothing to hide, nothing to prove and nothing to lose. This is how your mind, body, heart and soul become unified in that one moment. Time slows down. You are connecting with God - the eternal life force. In fact, the definition of eternity is the present moment. It has never NOT been the present moment - the only time that is real. That is merely a logical fact.
Your ability to be present depends on having good boundaries. That is the reason for the two hands in the Present Living & Learning logo. If you have weak boundaries, you will either lash out at others unjustly or you will be passive and let others run over you. When you are you, your focus is on self-control and self-responsibility. You don't control others, nor do you let others control you.
Being present begins with NOTICING when you are trying to alter the present moment and learning what you can do about it. You become aware that you use "judgments" to try to control others and yourself. This creates a 'victim' mindset. You learn to stop being a victim. You become a more decisive person who makes wiser choices in difficult, uncertain and even scary situations. Your self-confidence and self-trust grow tremendously, as does your faith and spirituality. You feel safer, which lets you be present with others. They will soon notice a real and positive change!
John's book, "What's Important Now" teaches six ways to notice and do what's important now so you can live more fully in the present. W.I.N. teaches you how to trust yourself to hold your ground when it's right for you, or to let it go when it's not.
The book, "The Non-Judgmental Christian" teaches five Bible-based lessons to revolutionize your relationships so you can be more present with those you love. This book reveals how judgments are the buttons that people push which trigger past wounds. Once triggered, a vicious cycle of "punch, counter-punch" begins. This cycle is taught in the Bible in Mt 7:1-5: "Do not judge or you will be judged...and the measure you use will be measured to you."
The book,
Who's The Driver Anyway?
teaches
a method for non-judgmental
collaboration to
help people work together better. It
is based on the simple metaphor of a
driver-passenger relationship and how
each shared decision-making power.
WTDA
empowers team members to take the
right level of responsibility for
their role inside any organizational
system. These tools cause a
person to be more present and happier
at work by creating better
expectations about how the
organization needs to function and
their role.
Non-judgment is the path to being present. Non-judgment quiets the mind. "Be still and know that I am God" Psalm 46:10. When the mind is still, we are sensitive to the voice of God - the promptings of the Holy Spirit. Now we can mover forward with confidence, trusting that we are getting the life we are meant to have.
When you are present, you are tuned in to your 'Quiet Inner Voice' that is spiritual. Many of us are quite present when we first wake up. We "sleep" on our challenges. Then we wake up and we simply "know" what's right for us. This is the Spirit prompting us. When we are in touch with our soul, the source of our being and who we really are, we can move forward in confidence.
A racing mind is evidence that you don't trust God. This condition of constant self-analysis disconnects you from hearing the Spirit. Your mind is racing. You experience inner conflict and second-guessing - struggling to be true to yourself, yet afraid others will judge you if you do. People you care about feel unloved by you because you don't feel loved yourself.
God exists in the present. The bible says, "I AM who I AM" in Exodus chapter 3. God is. He has always existed and so has the present moment. The past and future are merely ideas in our mind. No one can do anything real in the past or future. Only the present.
Enjoy these TEN practical benefits when you
focus on being present:
Five performance benefits:
Better performance under pressure. (you're focused)
Wiser, clearer decisions (you don't react out of habit)
Five health & relationship benefits:
Confidence and conviction in leading others. (you can handle their criticisms)