May, 2008
with John Kuypers

Dear Friend,

Do you mind what happens?  I was touched by a story I read recently where a "zen" master was asked the secret to how he stayed so calm and serene in the face of calamity and struggle.  He responded, "I don't mind what happens." 

I was struck by the simplicity of that.  It doesn't mean you don't "care" what happens.  You likely deeply care.  It means you don't feel a need to control what happens.  This is the essence of the journey of living in the present.  You accept that the only thing in the world that you can control is yourself.  That is difficult enough to manage without trying to control other people, the weather or where your golf ball lands!

Paradoxically, you may find that you are able to influence others in ways that you might not have thought possible.  When you stop trying to control others, they feel safe.  They do not feel "pressured" by you to change.  This means they can no longer blame you for their decisions.  They are forced to take ownership of their choices.  They may begin to see that their choices aren't working for them, and make changes of their own free will.

This may take years in some cases. But if you don't mind what happens, you no longer have a timeline or an agenda.  Then if it happens, well isn't that a bonus for them?!  You didn't mind if they didn't change so you can love them either way.

Finally, I must recommend Eckhardt Tolle's new book, A New Earth, which is where I read the story about the zen master.  I have never read a book that so eloquently and accurately describes the human ego as the obstacle to being present, accepting and non-judgmental.  If you read it in that light, and not as the main way to your spiritual salvation, then you will get much from it.  I believe that Jesus is the way to your spiritual salvation, and that being present connects you to the promptings of the Holy Spirit.  If you are obedient, then there is no reason to mind what happens around you.  Then you will see clearly what you need to do in this new present moment.

ps.  You might enjoy watching some short videos from various TV shows I've done in the past.  Go to http://www.youtube.com/johngkuypers  Topics include health, marriage, workplace and a motivational speech on being present.

pss.  I will be doing a one day seminar in Sudbury, Ontario called "The Miracle of Non-Judgment."  Timing is Saturday, June 14, 2008.  Go to http://www.presentliving.com/miracle.htm for details.  Please join me if you are able and interested.

Please forward this Present Living Thought to friends and colleagues.  Present living feels too good to keep it a secret!
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